A Time To Heal The Wound

I was so down and confused this morning when I woke up. My Sweet Weightless apologized from what happened last night. I was so ashamed of myself when I read his message because I regret of keeping things from my Sweet Weightless. I can't forget how he got mad at me, that makes me scares more if he'll leave me. I don't know why I love my Sweet so much.. T-T

Ouch!! T-T

Weightless : about the marriage thing? FORGET IT. I won't be marrying you

...Words That Strikes Most...

Weightless : once i snap out, there's no turning back and i won't regret anything because I CAN and I WILL
Weightless : tandaan mo yan
Weightless : and it's easy for me to move on
____________________________________________________

My kuya dan told me he's not serious because he can easily move on and forget me... T-T

Malekith, The Butterflies...

I feel really down and sick when Malekith pm-ed me at my YM. I told him about the discharging of blood and the pain I'm having. He explained to me that this is only butterflies in my stomache. I feel relief when he explained that to me. But why of all I had bad butterflies in my stomache?! T-T This cause me to feel lots of pain, sometimes I can't move, stand or walk because this makes me become so weak and tendency I kinda feel dizzy even if I'm only sitting. I hope I had a good butterflies, not a bad butterflies that cause me to bleed. T-T

I Thought It's Over T-T

It's been a bad day today since I don't even know if I'm sick. There's been a blood flowing out of me that makes me feel I'm weak. BTW, me and my Sweet Weightless almost broke up. I had to ask and beg him for another chance almost the whole afternoon. I was really scared that I can't help but cry when I heard he'll break up with me especially when he told me that he can move-on easily. Imagine how he told me that sentence, that scares me more. I just can't lose him. He didn't know I was hurt so much. I didn't let him know that or else he'll just end up telling me "you don't have the right to feel that". It's been so long since we had a talk, and there's a time when he almost forgot me. I texted him just to remind him of me. He never text me, I feel like we're away from each other too. I've been busy with my work since I need to close one more sale but still he never text me. Anyway, he wakes up almost in the afternoon, so I still have to wait for his reply. But sometimes, two messages from him is already lucky for me. This relationship is really something. It's different. Now, I'm being given another chance again. I should be more patient and more careful. I've made a vow that I won't talk to Limdul and other boys he doesn't want, I should know what he wants or not, and we'll meet wed. and fri.. Honestly, I'm broke right now. I don't have money, but I can't turn down that vow or else, he might not give me another chance. I'm already scared on what's happening with me now. If he only knew what I'm bringing with me now. I need him beside me, I'm so hurt, and I want to open up with him so I can share my feelings with him. He didn't even know that my bro has a threat on our relationship, bro told me once he'll tell our parents, it's over. I don't know how to place myself now like a normal gurl in a relationship. I envy them.

Being A Boy In A Relationship

I'm a gurl who wants to try to be a boy in our relationship. Even for once, I've been thinking if this would be the best relationship I could give to my Sweet Weightless. I hope this experiment will work things out, so I can correct our relationship. I know it's kinda hard, but all I need to do is to practice. For me, it's not easy to be a guy, maybe at first, because I'll be the one to handle all the things between us, but I know it'll be for the better of our relationship and at the end, it'll be worth for all the hardships. I've been with my team mates at work for so long. I envy them because their gf's meets with them at night and sometimes their bf's goes to them. One of my team mates told me that it's really nice and easy to be a guy if it's in a relationship, he has lots of patience, he lets his girlfriend do anything she wants, etc., that's when I decided to try it. Wish me luck! ;)

A Secret That Tells I Don't Know What To Do...

Things haven't been so good lately between me and my Sweet Weightless.. I don't know what to do. I've tried to be the best for my Sweet but I think he doesn't seem to realize it or is it that I'm the one who doesn't know how to be the best for my Sweet? Why? Is it because it's always my fault? Why? Because I don't understand my Sweet? I've grown up with a strict parents, I was disciplined that I almost wasn't able to see the world. Honestly, I'm not easy to understand, it's too complicated once you get to know me. I've been emotionally hurted and lots of griefs and hatred are still inside me. It is because on how my parents and friends treats me. How I wish I can go on with my own life now and enjoy. But all of that fades whenever I'm haunted by the things that has happened already. What's past isn't easily forgotten. Some remain in us, some we tend to forget. Plus my Sweet is too sensitive that sometimes it'll lead us always to a fight and arguements. Sometimes I ride with him, or else, things won't go well between us. I want to have more patience in order to work out our relationship. But even if I did, we still fight. It's a matter on how my Sweet will handle the situation though. I base it there! Because, sometimes I can't understand my Sweet. Like I made this blog and told him to visit it if he has time, but what do I get? I thought he'll like it but he didn't, he doesn't understand that he's the one who inspired me to these stuffs. When will he become proud of me as her girlfriend? Some people already did, but what about my own boyfriend? Btw, after he learn about this blog, he wants to erase the blog he did for me, it's just because I made this one, my first blog. Everytime I ask him what's the website addy of my blog, he always tells me that I always write on my blog full of rants, whines and things that I can't tell him. Well, sometimes it's true, because I have good reasons too. If I tell my Sweet a certain problem or some rants, we'll just end up fighting. Then better not tell him right? or I'll end up with his sentence such as: "wag mo ako uunahan", it means, if I'm the one who gets cold first, he'll be cold too. That's the reason why I can't even tell him my rants and stuffs. One more thing, I feel like I'm a boy in our relationship, though "ako sumusuyo sa kanya palagi" unlike what I heard from Sieg and Shaela's relationship, Sieg always look for Shaela in guildchat first while me and my Sweet are the reverse side of it. How about Shaela wanted to leave Insu and quit RO? Sieg just talked to her and now, Shaela is back again, in fact, she's now on a party for leeching in Comodo. Lucky her! Unlike for my Sweet, he'll just end up saying those threatening words and sentences such as: "I'll quit RO"; "We always fight in RO, I'll just quit RO now"; "I'll leave the guild"; etc. How will I compare all these things?

Sample

This is only a sample for my chatterbox design! :D

My First Blog!! ^^

Test? Test! 1..2..3..! Yeah!! :) At last! My first blog is here!! :) Aside from what my Sweet Weightless gave me "http://parfait.insurrectionweb.com" blog site. I've been wanting to do a blog since I met my him because he was the one who inspired me with lots of things that's connected with pc stuffs. ^^ Kinda weird though, but it's really something knowing my Sweet Weightless. Hihi..! ;)


This is my Sweet Weightless Baby Sasquatch!! :)