Saturday, February 26, 2005

I Made My Own Nightmare

Like what my Sweet told me "you made your own nightmare". I don't know what I feel right now. Hurt is the best way to describe it. I just hurt my Sweet so much that I couldn't accept it. My Sweet even told me not to call him "Sweet" anymore and we're through. I cried so hard but it seems I wasn't able to release them myself knowing my Sweet left me because of the stupid things I've made. My Sweet even told me "I don't love you anymore!"; "tom. morning hahanap na ako agad ng gurlfriend!" and "Even if dugo na ang iyak o luha mo dyan or dinudugo ka na,wala akong paki-alam sayo!" It really makes me hurt so much since he told me those things. I asked for help from bro but it seems that he wasn't able to help me that much. My Sweet told me that "I promised your bro that I won't leave you". I still don't know what to do until now hindi pa rin sya nagpaparamdam saken. The things he told me was so clear to me and I couldn't forget those striking words he said. It was engraved in my heart after he told me that. I just wish my Sweet Weightless will still come back to me one of these days because I really really need him so much now. I was still a bit shaky since I'm scared that my Sweet would find another gurl for him. I just don't know what to do right now. I'm so lost and it's like I'm in the middle of nowhere trying to find my Sweet in a desert... I love him so much and he's been a part of me... I don't know what to do if I lost him. If that happens, I want to end my life as well... I just couldn't take it that I've lost the one I truly love... :(

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